The vehicle is strangely familiar...

The Sector Seven Mobile Command Unit is an information control campaign. The government organization Sector Seven orchestrated a road tour of Sector Seven agents in order to convince the general public that N.B.E.s are definitely not real and definitely not in a cage in the back of their tour truck.

The Mobile Command Unit scheduled stops at various cinemas across America, where the movie-going public is filtered into the truck, told there are absolutely no Transformers, and, in theory, sent on their way. The agents are also interested in whether civilians are displaying any flu-like symptoms or Ear Fungus. However, these interrogations are invariably interrupted by a communication from Sector Seven Command which includes a very well-edited and scored satellite video feed of an alien robot attack in Qatar, despite the Unit's agents' protests. At the end of this embarrassing interruption, the civilians are asked to forget they saw the footage and are released, and reminded to UTH ("Use The Handrails", try to keep up with the acronyms).

Occasionally, the agents would stop passerby by calling their name and "requesting" that they come with them into the trailer to "discuss" certain matters. No, the trailer did not just shake. That wasn't a thud you heard. In fact, what passerby are you talking about?

Posters and stickers are available outside, and in some cases, cinnamon-scented air fresheners for your car.

S7 mobile command agents

From left to right, Agent Fortney, Agent Holmes, Agent Bernstein, and Agent Lacy. Not shown existing, various N.B.E.s.

S7 mobile command door

The door into the Mobile Command Unit has a grave warning posted to those who enter without (seemingly implicit) "written permission" of the installation commander.

Agents on tourEdit

  • Agent Bret Anthony
  • Agent Ryan Bernstein
  • Agent Rad Daly
  • Agent Marty Fortney
  • Agent Shannon Holmes
  • Agent John Lacy

Each agent was wearing a photo ID around their neck which featured their names. The agents insisted that their agent names were their real names, which, following some Internet research, seems to be at least partly confirmed.

Some agents were switched in or out of the tour, rather than following the entire route. It is possible that some had to bow out after experiencing flu-like symptoms. (Of course, they were not attacked by various NBEs, because said NBEs do not exist, right?)


Date Location Address Time
1 June Cinemark Tinseltown 10 (Melrose Park, IL) 1001 W North Ave, Melrose Park IL 60160 6pm - 11pm
2 June Regal Lincolnshire (Lincolnshire, IL) 300 Park Way Dr, Lincolnshire, IM 60069 3pm - 10pm
3 June Cinermark Woodridge 16 (Woodridge, IL) 6500 Rte 53, Woodridge, IL, 60517 12pm - 6pm
8 June Emagine Novi 18 - Novi, MI 44425 W 12 Mile Rd., Novi MI 48377 6pm - 11pm
9 June NA Ann Arbor, MI (Detroit) 4100 Carpenter Rd., Ypsilanti, MI 48197 3pm - 10pm
10 June Showcase Cinemas Flint West - Flint, MI 1591 South Graham Road, Flint, MI 48532 12pm - 6pm
15 June NA Huber Heights, OH 7737 Waynetown Blvd., Huber heights, OH 45424 6pm - 11pm
16 June NA Springdale, OH 12064 Springfield Pike, Springfield, OH 45246 3pm - 10pm
17 June Rave Polaris (Columbus, OH) 1071 Gemini Place, Columbus, OH 43240 12pm - 6pm
21 June NA W. Springfield, MA (Boston) 864 Riverdale St., West Springfield, MA 01089 5pm - 9pm
22 June NA Revere, MA (Boston) 565 Squire Rd., Revere MA 02151 6pm - 11pm
23 June NA Woburn MA (Boston) 25 Middlesex Canal Pkwy., Woburn MA 01801 3pm - 10pm
24 June NA Lowell, MA (Boston) 32 Reiss Ave., Lowell, MA 01851 12pm - 6pm
29 June Botcon in Providence, RI 9am - 5pm
30 June Botcon in Providence, RI 9am - 5pm
1 July Botcon in Providence, RI 9am - 5pm
6 July AMC Tustin 6pm - 11pm

External linksEdit

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